Claudette's Blog

Have you ever experienced someone taking the time to acknowledge just how you felt? How did it feel when someone was genuinely concerned about what you were going through?

• Did you feel understood?
• Loved?
• Cared for?
• Did you feel as if you mattered?

These are just a few of the things that we feel when someone takes the time to acknowledge our feelings. What better way to build and strengthen your relationships with your spouse, your kids, other family members and friends.

No one likes to be told what to do. Unsolicited advice is never welcomed and often, that’s not what people are looking for. What they want is an empathetic ear, so that they can filter through their own emotions, have a sounding board to help them decipher all that noise that is going on in their heads.

We all yearn to be understood, to be valued, to be heard. One of the most appreciated gifts people love to have, especially women, is knowing that someone is listening to them and that they are being heard and validated.

With Valentine’s Day coming up, what better gift to give than that of truly being there for the other person, of being attentive to what they are saying and being genuinely concerned about what is going on for them.

Try it and see what happens!

Have you read my special report on “Top Secrets of Highly Effective Family Communicators"? Get you very own copy here at www.coachingsteps.com. Plus, you’ll receive more tips just like these every week. The only way to improve on your relationship is by taking action now! What are you waiting for?

My son called me last week to announce to us that he finally asked his girlfriend of 20 months to marry him. She said yes. We were very happy because we know that he loves her very much. They have their issues and like all couples, they will learn to manage them.

One area that I hope to help them with, or at least be supportive of is Sami’s role as a stepmother. My granddaughter loves Sami very much and they never had a problem. At 5, Taylor is a very loving and affectionate little girl. She loves to dress up and to get dirty in the mud. Taylor loves to hang around Sami and Sami loves to be with Taylor

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Everyday, I coach couples and individuals on not blaming themselves for everything that happens in their lives. I tell them that sometimes, it's the situation that creates the problem and not you. This is especially true when someone you love is sick and not well. We look at what we did or could have done better to make sure that everyone is healthy and protected.

Well I too face those demons and need to remind myself that I do not control the entire universe. All I want is the best for my family and my husband and yet I too face the problem of having to see that the situation is the problem and nothing I did made it good or bad.

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